Secrets to a Lasting Marriage
 Do you remember your wedding day? Looking into your partner’s eyes and reciting your marriage vows to love them through thick and thin, sickness and health, better or worse? The love between two people on their wedding day can be felt throughout the room but what about 5, 10 or 25 years down the road? What is the secret to a successful marriage and why can some people make it work while others can’t?
Unfortunately divorce rates are on the rise. Society is changing, our relationships are changing and the family unit is changing greatly. There was a time when divorce was unheard of and the number of children in a class coming from broken homes were few. Nowadays half the students in a class will have divorced parents. Is there are reason for this trend and what can be done to keep husbands, wives and families together?
Long lasting marriages can be attributed to a number of things; love, trust, communication, sharing of responsibilities, etc. The list goes on and on. When a young couple first enters their marriage they may quite literally be blinded by love and could be unaware of all the other things required to keep a relationship strong. Once the rose tinted glasses are removed and the honeymoon stage is over they may start to see what’s lacking. This does not however mean that the relationship is doomed. Once you’ve established the gaps it’s time to start filling them. Marriage is an organic thing that must be tended to throughout.
Communication is key. If one or both parties are unhappy about something they must discuss it. For a discussion to occur both people must be willing to listen to the other person. It’s also important to know the difference between fact and feeling. Open communication is the first step in keeping a relationship strong and will lead to other traits being established, like trust.
Trust is so important for a relationship. When there is little trust it effects both parties. One will always be questioning things and the other will be walking on eggshells. A lack of trust can create anxiety in the relationship and will cause it to breakdown. It is possible to rebuild someone’s trust if it has been lost but to do that we have to go back to the point of communication. When trust has be broken it may not be enough to just communicate with each other. Introducing a third party by means of a therapist can help greatly. A marriage counsellor will help to filter through emotions and can get to the root of the problem to help the couple see where the other person is coming from. Once open communication can be re-established the couple will be able to reconstruct their foundation.
In any relationship there will always be compromises. The key to a good relationship is a balance in the compromises. If one partner feels like they are always giving in or having to make sacrifices they will start to resent the other partner. A balance in the workload and helping each other out will keep both people happy.
It’s also important to have your own life and your own identity. Having different hobbies or interests can help keep a relationship strong. You’ll each have something to talk about and you’ll maintain a level of independence. When you don’t spend every waking moment together you’ll be more excited to see and talk to the other person.
Along with having your own activities, schedule time to be with each other. Lives can become hectic, especially if children are involved. Set up regular date nights to reconnect with your partner. Quiet nights together will rekindle your relationship, will remind you of why you fell in love in the first place and will give you the time to catch up and communicate all the things you haven’t had time to talk about.
The truth to a successful marriage is that there isn’t a secret to making it work. A marriage isn’t work but it does take a concerted effort from both people to stay active and involved in the relationship. Relationships don’t just happen you have to build and maintain them. You saw something special in your partner the day you got married. Never forget that.
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Allowance – To Give or Not?
 Money management is a skill that some adults don’t possess. Is it possible to teach children how to manage money before they get to adulthood and the risks become more severe? There may be a way. Giving your child an allowance could be the way. However, it’s not just about giving them money. You also have to teach them the valuable lessons on saving and spending wisely.
By starting these lessons at an early age you will be building the foundations for smart spending and money management which will benefit your children greatly when they become adults and have to deal with juggling income with mortgages, bills and saving.
An allowance has to be agreed upon by both parents and a regular routine should be established. If you decide to give the allowance at the beginning of the week continue to give your child money on a Monday. If you’re giving the allowance for weekend spending then always give on a Friday. The important thing is to be consistent. Being consistent on when the allowance is given will prevent confusion, overpaying and will establish a routine for your child that is similar to receiving a paycheque once they start working.
A good time to start giving an allowance is when your child starts asking for you to buy them things. Instead of always purchasing the item for your child giving them an allowance and letting them buy the item themselves will teach them the value of money. The amount you give should be appropriate for their age and will increase as they grow. When children are very young their spending habits are different. They will most likely be interested in buying toys or small items that catch their eye at the grocery store. At a young age they are not yet going out on their own with friends and aren’t interested in clothes yet. Therefore, they only need a small weekly allowance. Pre-teens and early teens will require more as they will want to do things with their friends. Their allowance should be within reason so that it allows them to do the things they want but maybe not every time. That way they will have to learn to prioritize their spending and perhaps save a few weeks to have enough to do what they want. Once a child starts earning their own wage through work outside the home their allowance should cease.
Although some believe that allowance should be linked to work or chores around the house others disagree. You don’t want to get your kids in the habit of only helping out if they’re going to be paid for it. Household chores should be shared amongst the family whether an allowance is given or not. This will give your kids a good work ethic.
Discuss with your kids what they will be spending their money on. You should stay involved in their saving and spending habits to guide them along the way and to know that they are spending their money appropriately. Keep a watchful eye but let them make spending mistakes so they can learn from them. The best way to learn is through trial and error.
Knowing how to save money is so beneficial for their future. We all know that unexpected things happen in adulthood and having savings is so important. Anything from losing a job to household renovations can cause panic and stress if the savings aren’t there. Teaching saving is also a starting point to get young adults on the right path to saving for their retirement. The earlier you start the less you’ll have to put in from each pay. There are a few ways to teach your kids about saving. For young kids a good way to start is to have them pick a big purchase that would take weeks or even months to save for. By having them choose an item it gives them a goal to work towards. As they put their money aside for this big purchase you can keep a record and track their progress. They will get excited as the get closer to their goal and will be able to see the benefits to putting the money away instead of spending it right away. Another way to teach saving is to open an account with them at the bank and have them put a small amount away from each allowance. Experts recommend 10% Make sure they are involved in the entire process, from opening the account to putting in the deposits and allow your child to keep their own bank records so they can see the balance rise. Getting them involved gives them a base to knowing how banks work and will introduce them to financial processes like earning interest.
In a time of financial uncertainty it pays to have money management skills and the best time to start is early. Giving your kids an allowance will give them the tools to make smart money decisions and put them on the path to successful personal financial management.
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Get Out of A Work Slump
 Are you in a work slump and need help clawing your way out? Being in any kind of slump is not something enjoyable. But, when it is a work slump this can affect your life much more because it is your livelihood. Here are some ways to try and get yourself out of the dreaded work slump. Reward Yourself
Sometimes the slump is just based on motivation. Working day to day doing the same thing can become exhausting, especially if you are not getting praise from anybody. Well, praise yourself. Make goals for yourself and when they are complete treat yourself to something you really want, but never get. For example, go to the spa and get pampered or have an extra-long weekend with the family or the girls/guys. Sometimes you just need to be told you are doing a good job and that you matter in what you are doing every day. If someone isn’t there to tell you, then just tell yourself. You do not need anybody but you to get through the day.
Take a Vacation
Perhaps you are just so worked that you cannot focus anymore. Work can become a stressful place and take its toll on the brain and your energy. Then you go home and work some more with the family or on the house. Life is just never ending. Work is what you have to do to survive though, so it makes you more miserable. Taking a vacation can clear your head and rejuvenate your mind. We all get stressed with work and home so a little bit of relaxing time could be just what you need. When taking a vacation make sure to go somewhere you have always wanted to go, a place that makes you happy. Once you are done with the vacation you can go back to work and feel ready for the day and work ahead of you. When you get down at work again just think back to the vacation and work for the next one.
Find Something New
Maybe it is simply time to try and find another job. When you have done everything there is to do and climbed your way to the top already, go achieve something else. If you are not inspired anymore work can become a chore that is dreaded every day. You may not even want to get up in the morning to go. That is a sure sign you are unhappy with what you do and a change needs to be made. Ask yourself what you care about and what you want to achieve in your life. Maybe you were headed down the wrong road all along. If you are financially stable already, then simply look for what you want and what makes you happy. Not everyone can be in a financial place in their life to do this, but if you are, than it is what you should do.
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Combat Seasonal Allergies
 The sun is shining, the birds are singing and children are running and riding around. You look through the window and it’s so inviting but just when you think it’s safe to go outside and enjoy the fresh air it hits you; watery and itchy eyes, sneezing and a runny nose, even a sinus headache. Seasonal allergies affect so many people and can turn what’s meant to be an enjoyable time of year into a nightmare. Don’t suffer another year with your seasonal allergies. Nip them in the bud and get outside to enjoy the nice weather.
Common outdoor allergens include grasses, pollens, trees and ragweed. There are also indoor allergens which will affect people more in the winter when we’re not airing out the house. These will include dust and mold. Along with the itchy, watery eyes and the nasal congestion mentioned above fatigue is another common symptom for allergy sufferers.
Allergies occur when the immune system overreacts to a harmless substance. When allergens are present the body will react with an immune response even though the allergens themselves won’t cause harm to the body.
If you haven’t been affected by allergies in the past the symptoms can be confused with those of the common cold. One major distinction between a cold and allergies is the time of year. Allergies will usually occur at the same time every year. If you’re unsure speak with your Doctor. They will be able to determine the presence of allergies through a skin test. Skin tests are done by putting a small amount of the allergen into the skin through a prick. If a red lump develops then an allergy is present.
Unfortunately you cannot rid yourself of allergies but you can alleviate the symptoms. Antihistamines and decongestants are the most common ways to relieve your symptoms. An allergy shot can also increase the ability of the body to deal with allergens. Another option for clearing up congestion is to use a saline and water nasal spray. The sprays will also wash away pollen. Steroid nasal sprays will reduce inflammation in the nasal passage which will help ease breathing problems and eye drops will alleviate itchy or watery eyes.
There are lots of options for you to reduce your allergy symptoms. Speak with your Doctor or Pharmacist to find which one is most suitable for your allergies. Combat symptoms before they start and control them throughout the allergy season so you can enjoy the fresh air and time outdoors with family and friends.
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Tonsillectomies, Not Just For Kids.
 It’s unlikely that tonsillectomy comes to mind when you think of adult surgeries but it’s a procedure that’s more common than you would think. Typically performed on young children, a tonsillectomy is the procedure to remove tonsils that are prone to infection. This article will look more closely at the recovery process for adults after a tonsillectomy. The actual procedure to remove the tonsils is the same in adults and children.
Firstly, I am not going to lie. A tonsillectomy for an adult is far more painful than for a child. It is unknown why this happens as the same procedures are used, but the best guess is that children have a far greater threshold for pain, mainly because they have never experienced as much pain as adults. Don’t worry though, there are plenty of things that you can do to ease the pain a little, and I will cover these a little later on.
Perhaps the key difference between tonsillectomies for adults and children is the recovery time. In children it is far shorter at just under a week, adults on the other hand are going to need to wait at least two weeks to be completely healed. During this time you will be unable to work, and thus if you need to undergo a tonsillectomy you should schedule it when you are not at work i.e. during vacation time. As mentioned before, it is likely you will be in a bit of pain, so if possible, maybe your partner could be there to help you out during the recovery process.
Thankfully, there are a number of things that you can do after undergoing an adult tonsillectomy to help relieve the pain somewhat. Perhaps the best is drinking a nice cold drink, make sure it isn’t fizzy. This will help soothe your throat which will make you feel better. If the pain is still unbearable then opt for a mild pain killer like ibuprofen. These have anti-inflammatory effects, and that should help reduce the pain considerably. Make sure you take them according to the instructions on the packet or you can get end up causing severe damage to your stomach. If you’re still experiencing pain then speak with your Doctor.
Remember, there is a chance that you will suffer absolutely no pain during your tonsillectomy, or even after. It may be rare, but there are plenty of adults out there who have recovered from tonsillectomies without feeling any affects of the surgery at all. However, please do not be nervous. It is a rather simple procedure, and the pain isn’t as bad as what living with your infected tonsils would be, so please do not delay going through the procedure. It is absolutely vital if you want to live a healthy life. Remember, there are plenty of things that can help you out if you do suffer from pain. Your doctor will always be there to give you advice and help you through the healing process in any case.
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